the days that count

day 1. I had a thought: what if I was blind? Could I have ever seen things clearly?

day 2. And I wondered: what if I was deaf? Could I have ever listened to my heart?

day 3. I looked back and asked myself: what if I couldn't  walk? Could I have ever followed my dreams?

day 4. And I stopped for a moment: what if I had no arms? Could I have ever given someone a hand?

all the other days. So I knew I had no excuse. I was ashamed. I looked down. I looked around. I talked to my mum. I walked home that day. I painted my nails red.

ignorance is bliss

Lucian Blaga

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Vei plânge mult ori vei zâmbi? 

Eu 
nu mă căiesc,
c-am adunat în suflet şi noroi-
dar mă gândesc la tine.
Cu gheare de lumină
o dimineaţă-ţi va ucide-odată visul,
că sufletul mi-aşa curat,
cum gândul tău il vrea,
cum inima iubirii tale-l crede.
Vei plânge mult atunci ori vei ierta?
Vei plânge mult ori vei zâmbi
de razele acelei dimineţi,
în care eu ţi-oi zice fără umbră de căinţă:
"Nu ştii ca numa-n lacuri cu noroi pe fund cresc nuferi?"

mi-era cam dor de dragul de Blaga.

the wedding. the photographs. the one.

Excerpt from a very nice article on weddings:

`As I think back on the hundred-plus weddings I've photographed, I want to emphasize this:
Every wedding is perfect.

I love a good party.
I love a bride in the most elaborate, fancy, princess-y dress you've ever dreamed of.
I love custom chuppahs and embroidered aisle runners and matchy-matchy bridesmaids dresses.
I love to photograph flowers and shoes.

But you know why I REALLY do what I do?

To photograph your parents, who will hold hands and cry on the first row of the chapel. To photograph your sister dancing with that boy she will marry in three years. To photograph those kids who will grow up so, so quickly. To photograph your grandfather, who will pass away next spring. To photograph your first kiss as a married couple, your best friend busting out her signature dance moves, the flower girl asleep under a table, and maybe even your ex looking pretty wistful as he hugs you a little too long in the receiving line.

You already know: your cake will disappear in less than an hour, your flowers will wilt before the ceremony ends, and that uncomfortable tux will go back to the rental place in the morning. But those photos... they're gonna be there forever. You'll have them when your own kids are born, when you have the biggest fight ever with your partner and need to be reminded of how much you really love each other, when your parents pass away and you realize the last time you danced with them was at your wedding...

f you're planning your wedding right now, please just close the magazine. Log out of Pinterest. And look at the person you want to grow old with. Remind yourself of why you're doing this. And really CELEBRATE when that day comes. Don't stress about your shoes or your cake or your flowers. Don't stress about anything. When it's all over, you will be married, and surrounded by the people who know you and love you most in the whole wide world.

I promise: that is the Perfect Wedding.`

I miss you!

we don`t only cry death. we cry loss. we cry change. we cry because we can`t find reasons or because we don`t want to find them. we cry at night or when mornings are the worst, when we`re alone or too many people tell us it`s gonna be fine. we cry the need to smile when we`re not able to. we cry people, thoughts, gestures, photographs, we cry animals, flowers, sun and rain. we cry when we need it the most, until the sun dries them tears off our face. we cry when we can`t hold the tears in anymore, when we need attention, when we stop for a second at the street corner to look at two kids playing catch and all our childhood comes flashing red flags at us. we cry when we really want to scream like crazy. when the world doesn`t stop for our troubles. when despite the odds, we get lucky. we cry the happiness we can`t foresee or believe we don`t deserve. we cry thinking of the last time we saw our grandparents, the last words they said to us, the time we made our mother cry cause we couldn`t just shut up. we cry when we miss the friends we thought will always be friends. when we look back and only see dust or regret. when we don`t recognize our dreams in a sea of little blue droplets of `maybe-s` and `what if-s` and `if only-s`.

but when all the others fade in the light of a new day and in the thin air of a new breath, we cry death, cause it`s the easiest.

I miss you!